Dulce's Story

My story is very similar to everyone else's in the regard that I have suffered. I don't believe, however, that suffering has been "bad" for me. I believe that as Kahlil Gibran says "the same well that sorrow digs, joy fills.”  In that regard, I accept my suffering for it allows me to understand and hold a capacity for joy. I am grateful for the loss I have experienced (though I wasn't at the time) for it has turned me into a vessel capable of heights I've never known before. I don't want to reveal the details of my pain though I know they're part of my story. It's enough to say that it involves a civil war, blood, fear, physical pain, emotional anguish, angst, loss of home and family, long difficult travel, confusion, guilt, religious bondage, divorce, and divorce again.

The story of my joy is an Oasis experience. In my anguish, my wandering in the desert so to speak, travelers on the road of life fed and watered me with their smiles, their food, the gifts of their hearts and spirits. My pain was alleviated and dulled, and eventually, came to be nothing but a distant memory, thanks to their love and my belief in the infinite wisdom that lies behind all things. Those travelers had no idea how sweet their kindness was to me. Like an oasis in the desert their pools of water were life to me. Can you picture it? The shimmering heat, the pounding heart, the dry mouth and deadly fear that there's nothing else but this dreadful experience, when in the distance the merest hint of green and water beckons. Now, it takes two things at that point for the grieving one to acknowledge. One: can they see the hope? Two: will they move towards it?

You can take a horse to water, but you can't make him...  you know the story. The potential to receive gifts from the Universe lies in our ability to first acknowledge them and then to move towards them in hope and faith. Of course, it's easier said than done. But it does happen. I'm here as proof! The reciprocal nature of life itself continues to amaze me. Consider a question. If you had the ability to help heal someone (which you do), would you do it without them asking for a healing from you or is it necessary that they ask to be healed? What is your answer to that question?

Here's how I addressed it. I had to, you see. I had to decide whether or not my life could be a wonderful, joyful, rich experience. I decided it could be. In fact, here was the shocking thing, I decided that it SHOULD be! How exciting!

Several things happened at that time. I received some body work, both deep tissue massage and lymph node massage. And I did some deep spiritual and emotional work. I went to work too, on the structure of my thoughts. I  learned to meditate for the first time and came to understand the principle of Ascension, a technique taught to me by the monks of the Ishaya Order. The concept that I could connect directly to the Great Divine at any time helped me through a series of difficult actions that ultimately freed me. I will always be grateful to the Ishaya's and their teachings of praise, gratitude, love and compassion. The practice of silence, and being comfortable with silence, has been especially empowering to me.

 The rest, they say, is history. As Abbie says (see her story) healing happens imperceptibly. I really couldn't see the changes until a couple of months later when still reeling from all I had done in such a short span of time I had, dare I call it, an epiphany.

 I had buried the ashes of my past life out in the garden. It was my first act in my new home. I had burnt a time line I’d made of my life and buried the ashes under a garden angel thus honoring my past and releasing it. I had no intention of starting out new with a suitcase full of old stuff that no longer fit me. I'm speaking metaphorically of course but I wanted to be available to happiness when it came along. Well, I was out there at the angel doing some emergency garden work on a very hot, dry day.

 I had with me, out there in the heat, a gift of a garden elephant I’d been given as a symbol of Oasis. Though I had burnt my past life, bought a house, filed for a divorce and had my life open to the Universe, I was still deeply grieving. I clutched that garden statue elephant under my arm and cried. I cried for all I had lost. I cried for the loss of my marriage. I cried for my African home. I cried for the elephants, suffering as their world diminishes. I cried too for all I'd gained and for the moment of birth and death I was simultaneously experiencing.

 I went to work prepping the soil around the plants as they had suffered in the heat. The elephant stayed close to my side. When the work was done I sat back on my heels and closed my eyes in silent prayer. I could hear the water running on the plants. The sound was like a gentle cascade. I could feel the moisture in the dry desert air. My mouth was parched as I hadn't stopped to drink and I knew from that small experience how those plants must have suffered waiting for water. I looked down at Ellie the elephant and saw her little sturdy legs poised at the edge of the water now lying in a pool around the plants and the angel. It was like a scene from the desert, and at that moment I knew the meaning of Oasis.

 Oasis is water in the desert. Oasis is a place where the thirsty can come and take what they need to go on. Oasis is reached after much traveling and searching. It is a place that appears out of the mirage of heat and confusion. It is a place of promise and hope. Ellie the plaster elephant is representative of elephants everywhere. Elephants are suffering. Their habitats are dwindling and they are shot and killed daily for their flesh and ivory. This is true of all animals and plants everywhere on the planet at this time. Oasis is a state of mind in which all things are restored to their natural order and balance, where all creatures can take nourishment. It is a spiritual sphere in which the essence of elephants and angels live. As long as we remember, like the elephant, and as long as we are the water of Oasis, then there is life on this planet. For we hold all things in our mind's eye in a state of grace. As we thinketh, so it is. And my belief, my thought, is that all things live forever in the mind of God/dess. Oasis is food and water for that thought.  

This place here on the Web, is an oasis. Come join with us. Allow us to help you in your journey to joy through the valley of suffering and grief. We're all just travelers. We all know pieces of the road. As the Wise Ones say, "this too shall pass." Indeed it will. It's a lot easier though if you take along plenty of water. You are not alone.             

May God bless and keep you.  

Your friend, Dulce